You Are More Than Your Last Performance Review
Dear Soul,
You are more than your last performance review. You may think that nothing matters but how well you’re doing in your job, but that’s not true. You have just as much right to take up space as anyone else, regardless of your performance. The rockstars in your class aren’t better people than you, and the people transitioning out of the business are just as worthy of your attention and approval as anyone else. Worth is not a function of value added, and it’s not a function of efficiency. Worth is innate. You are worthy because you are you, because you are here.
When you look at a forest, you see trees of all shapes and sizes. Some are straight. Some are curved. Some are tall. Some are short. Some are great for shade. Some create more oxygen than others. Some are great for firewood, and others make great tables. Some are known for their flowers, or fruit, or sap. Next time you walk through a forest, though, see if you can relate to the trees beyond your concept of their usefulness. Pause for a moment and just watch the way the branches sway in the wind. Listen to the sound of the leaves in the wind. Feel the bark on your hands. Lean on its trunk. Notice the silence and the stillness in between the movement and the noise. And then you might ponder: How can the essence of one of these trees be better than the essence of another? Who are we to compare creation itself. Do these trees owe it to me to prove their worth to me, or is it possible for each one to be beautiful in its own way? What if the forest isn’t complete without every tree in it?
When you get out of your mind, the worth of creation – all of it – becomes self-evident. And, just like the tree, your worth isn’t in what you produce for others. Your worth is in your smile, the way you laugh, the funny way you look at things, the way you get really excited about your passions, the way you talk, the way you listen, the life in your eyes. There is nobody in the world like you. Creation is not complete without you. So, you don’t have to apologize for being here. You don’t need to prove to anyone that you belong, or that you’re good enough. Of course you belong. That’s why you’re here!
It matters that you know this. When you base your self-esteem on your performance, it’s not healthy, and it doesn’t serve you. What it does is make you emotionally and spiritually dependent on forces that you can’t fully control. It makes even the little things feel high-stakes, and the pressure it puts on you makes it harder to focus, to relax, and to do all the little things that lead to success. Stress messes with your memory, your capacity for long-term planning, your intuition, and your complex problem-solving ability. You do your best work when you’re relaxed, when you feel safe, when you’re inspired by love, inspiration, curiosity, and passion, rather than shame, guilt, and fear. It’s in the best interest of you, your team, and your organization, for you to lighten up a little, and to realize that it’s just a job. More importantly, though, you have a right to feel safe at work, and to not feel like your very existence is on the line every time review season comes around. You have permission to be okay. You have permission to take care of yourself. You have permission to have hobbies outside of work, and to prioritize the things that keep you healthy and happy.
You are more than your last performance review. Your presence is a gift to the world, and nothing can take that from you. And one more thing: you are loved. People care about you more than you know. People want you to be happy, and I’m one of them. I’m rooting for you, and I hope you find what you’re looking for.
Peace & Love,